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Speak Geek

Dee Yun Dee Yun: (contact-deleteme[at]-deleteme-direman [dot] com) 2007-07-20 03:48:49

He Would've Been in Bigger Trouble if She Was Into It

Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis is utterly purchase-worthy. You can find used copies of it for under $20. It mainlines the experience of ping pong directly to you without frills but with hardcore intensity. For those of you who've seen Dr. Strangelove, this game delivers Purity of Essence.

It plays sort of like Virtua Tennis, except it's much faster due to the tiny size of the "court". It's incredibly accessible, as anyone can pick it up and start thwacking the ball around. Thankfully, Table Tennis is as difficult to master as it is easy to learn. The controls are crisp and precise, and enable you to pull off deep strategies once you grow into the game. I've gotten to the point where I can think a couple of shots ahead, sort of like chess, except that you have to strategize while the ball is zipping around like a quark in a particle accelerator.

Perhaps the best (and ironic) praise I can lavish on this title, is that it stresses me like no other video game. I was playing with my buddy Ben over Live, and we were paddle ninjas, volleying and returning ridiculously awesome shots until I finally snuck one past him as our shot count hit 103. One hundred and three smacks of the ball to earn a single point! Dueling to a set of 11 points was mentally exhausting, much less winning matches. This simple, distilled intensity is why I so highly recommend this game.

I understand that Table Tennis is being developed for the Nintendo Wii as well. I instantly see the appeal that Wii Sports brought, but Table Tennis requires the surgical preciseness of the face buttons. They'd have to dumb it down to make the Wii controls anywhere near responsive enough. Swinging the Wiimote around would be way too slow to return shots, much less getting the desired spin on the ball consistently. Get the 360 version; Xbox Live thrashes those horrid Friend Codes on the Wii anyway.

Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis - Rank A

Now Playing - Bomberman Live (Xbox Live Arcade)

Xbox Live Gamertag - Vawce

David Vargas David Vargas: (dave-deleteme[at]-deleteme-squishycomics [dot] com) 2007-07-20 08:42:46

He Speaks Truth

All it took for me to want to buy it was Dee bringing this beauty to my place over for a couple of hours.

Anyone can, indeed, play this game. If there is a claim that a game is easy to pick up, I put it to the test. That test is "can my video game illiterate mother play this?" Thus far only three games have passed this test: Mario Golf for the GC, Pac-Man C.E., and now Rockstar Table Tennis.

I'm having a good time trying to figure out all the subtleties of this game. I'm getting to the point where I can give Dee a run for his money, although I have yet to beat him. But I will, oh yes, I will.

Now Playing:
-Rockstar Table Tennis

P.S. I'll leave the games rating up to Dee. I'll stick to liking or not liking a game ;)

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