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Five Stages of Metal Gear Online Beta

Dee Yun Dee Yun: (contact-deleteme[at]-deleteme-direman [dot] com) 2008-04-25 05:28:44

The Japanese Hate the Internet

Every aspect of how the Japanese approach online play is fraught with frustration. It's almost as if they're deliberately trying to make you hate going online. Nintendo has their ridiculous "friend codes", deliberate lack of voice chat and leaderboards, and insufficient storage space for downloadables. The PlayStation Network offers no way to communicate with friends if you're playing different games; the Japanese consider it rude to bother someone by sending them a game invite. Many PlayStation 3 games provide no voice chat whatsoever. Come to think of it, many PlayStation 3 games have no online function, period.

So here comes Metal Gear Online which decides to bypass the PlayStation Network entirely, by running it's own online system. Yeah, you have to sign up with Konami, and then again with Metal Gear Online. Both processes impose idiotic restrictions on the number and type of characters you can use for logins/passwords. And then, Konami, in their infinite wisdom, failed to anticipate the amount of people jumping into the Beta, and their limited server capacity collapsed under the weight of fanboys wanting a peek. I wanted to give you my impressions, but it was just an unplayable clusterfuck. Konami shut it down, and announced that the Beta would be back up and running later today. Maybe. If they can figure out the Intraweb.

The "Five Stages of Grief" apply fairly well to the frustrations inherent to videogaming. Take World of Warcraft for example:

DENIAL - "They did not just nerf me with that patch. No. No no."

ANGER - "The server is down? Fuck!"

BARGAINING - "Everyone pass on that [item you desperately need]. Please?"

DEPRESSION - "Only 98,000 more murloc fins to reach Revered status..."

ACCEPTANCE - "I pay Blizzard $15 every month for the privilege of working a second job."

Now Playing - Condemned 2: Bloodshot (360)

Xbox Live/PSN Gamertag - Vawce

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